BulgingButtons

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A Milestone – College Move In

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His actual dorm.

I can’t believe that I have yet to post anything about my boy going off to college. He’s been there two weeks! Well, not quite. Ten days actually, but who’s counting? Other than me, I mean.

The move in itself went remarkably smoothly, considering how enormous his university is and how many students were all moving in on the same day. There were hang-tags and driving routes and giant boxes on wheels with helpers who literally unloaded the cars and delivered the goods to student rooms. Wow. So different than my college days.

What’s not different is the feel of the dorm room. Yes, it’s cramped. Yes, it’s seen better days. And yes, I’m glad I’m not sharing that bathroom with three other people, but it’s a dorm room. It will work out just fine. His roommate seems like a decent kid, and he reports that they’re getting along well. Perfect. He just needs a place to land, sleep, shower, change, and move along. That dorm will serve its purpose just fine.

He moved in on Saturday the 13th and started classes on the following Thursday. He still hasn’t been through a whole rotation, but already he’s telling me about lab partners and research projects and trying to sort out whether he’s in the correct math class. He’s made a couple of new friends, reconnected with some old ones, and already participated in the old campus tradition of whitewashing the giant A that overlooks the campus from the side of “A Mountain” (which is really a butte, but don’t tell anyone).

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I’m really happy for him, and I know he’s going to do great, but I’m also missing him. I miss telling him to pick up his socks and walk the dog. I miss riding in the car with him (he finally got his license!) and catching Pokemon with him (I’m a little addicted, more than he is). I just miss having him around.

He’s been texting me a little, which is great.  Today he asked me to take him to a store for a lab notebook. I did. Of course. We went out for dinner too, just the two of us. Listening to him talk about his classes and new adventures was so gratifying. He’s in the right place, doing what he needs to do. I need to accept and embrace that without feeling sad about him growing up. I can’t help it, though. I’m a sentimental kind of mom. I love that kid completely, and I miss him already.


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Back to Work

ac11b59841a3ae3e0c1cb460ccc05585Tomorrow is my first official day of work since summer vacation. Never mind that I spent the day at school today, in my 88 degree classroom (someone should be fixing that soon, I HOPE!). Tomorrow I actually get paid to be there. So why am I still up? It’s past midnight, I should be tucked away in my bed sound asleep.

Maybe it’s first day nerves, but I doubt it, those are reserved for next Monday, when the children show up.

Maybe it’s because there’s a new principal and I don’t quite know what to expect. Maybe, but he seems okay, and I’ve been through administration changes before, so I don’t think that’s quite it.

Maybe it’s because I’m not ready to give up on summer yet.

I think that’s the issue. I want it to be summer vacation for a little while longer. I want to have lazy days when I’m not expected to do anything or be anywhere. I want to sleep in and go swimming and read novels and eat ice cream for lunch if I feel like it. I want to be unstructured, untethered, and unsupervised. I want to be left to my own devices, for just a little while longer.

Is it selfish? Of course it is. Few people have the luxury of a several week long break from their jobs. I know it’s a great perk of the difficult career I’ve chosen.Still, I’m not ready to give it up yet.

I had an unusually busy summer, with three trips out of state and a two week writing camp thrown in. I also turned 50, came to grips with the idea of my son moving out (well, more or less), and spent time with him playing Pokemon Go! I have no regrets.

The books I was going to read are still unread. The recipes I was going to try still haven’t been made, and the room I was going to organize is still a mess. The decorations from May’s graduation party are still in the dining room, and the end-of-year gifts from students are still in their decorative bags, waiting to be put away. I suck.

But really, I don’t. I had a productive summer. I rested, I played, I taught, I learned. I read, I wrote, I traveled, I swam, I danced. I aged, I laughed, and I loved. It was enough, if you can ever really get enough of those things. Now that I think about it, maybe I am ready to go back. My heart feels a little fuller and my curiosity about my new group of students has been piqued. I think I’m okay now. I think my summer ended up being just perfect. I hope yours is too.

 


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I’m Back

cat-in-the-hatOh goodness, I hardly know where to begin. So much has happened in the last several weeks that my mind is mushing it all together and the words aren’t forming themselves the way they’re supposed to.

Instead of a long rambling post, which I don’t think I can manage right now, and which I KNOW you don’t want to read, how about a table of contents of sorts. Here’s what’s been on my mind recently, some or all of which may find its way into blog posts over the next several days.

  1. Airline travel revisited
  2. Turning 50
  3. Being first in line (out of 10,000 or so)
  4. No extra frosting for me
  5. Except on my sweetheart’s caramel cake
  6. A San Antonio Wedding
  7. Writing Around New Orleans
  8. Fiction, non-fiction, or poetry? Or do I have to choose?
  9. Pokemon Go!
  10. My trip to the Emergency room, Ovarian cysts, and the questions I now have
  11. Back to School, or the party’s over
  12. Expanding the Mind, and increasing the value of learning for its own sake

See, there’s a lot rattling around up there. Oh, and the house is a mess and I’ve actually been cooking real food recently and the boy is going to move into the dorms in a frighteningly short amount of time, and he has to take his driver’s test still. OH. MY. GAWD.

It’s just all too much right now. Too much to juggle. Too much to handle. Too much to process. No wonder I just want to run around (run away) chasing imaginary critters with my phone. But this too shall pass, so I’m going to breathe, go take a shower, and eat some lunch. Yeah, it’s almost 2:30 pm, I make no apologies.

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